I'm hosting, today, a promo on Giulia Lagomarsino's latest release, Free-Fire Zone (Owens Protective Services #17), as a part of the ongoing release blitz tour. Also find a long excerpt from the featured book. Note that Free-Fire Zone is free in kindle unlimited!!
Free-Fire Zone
Giulia Lagomarsino
(Owens Protective Services #17)
Published: February 26, 2024
Cover Design: T.E. Black Designs
Photographer: Reggie Deanching
Giulia Lagomarsino
(Owens Protective Services #17)
Published: February 26, 2024
Cover Design: T.E. Black Designs
Photographer: Reggie Deanching
She’s amazing.She’s so funny and smart and beautiful and…amazing.
I have it so bad for her, and I thought for a moment she liked me too.
Then I realized what I thought was a sign of her liking me was actually a sign she was sliding me into the dreaded friend zone.
I fu@king hate the friend zone.
I was so close to winning her over, and then that roughneck came along, pushing me even further into the zone.
Just like a mechanic, he has qualities I could never possess—like working with a wrench. I could hold a wrench for a photograph and no woman would drool over me.
Alas, that’s the life of a protection agent. Sure, I have rippling muscles and can kill a guy with my bare hands, but I could never compete with this illusion women have about greasy men.
And to make matters worse, I said she could stay with me.
That’s right. I am officially the stupidest man ever.
I’ve doomed myself to a life of fantasies that will never be fulfilled, all because I can’t stop picturing that beautiful, thick hair cascading over her shoulders like a waterfall.
Like I said…
I have it bad, and there’s no way out for me.
An Excerpt from Free-Fire Zone:
“What are you grinning about?” Brock asked as I plopped down in my chair with a beer.
“I think I have a real chance with Laura.”
“Yeah? Even after she flashed you multiple times, then ran upstairs like her hair was on fire?”
“Relax. I got the signal. It’s all good.”
“What’s the signal?” he questioned.
“She punched my shoulder.”
“Ah, the punch the shoulder routine. That’s a classic.”
“I know, which is why I know it’s all good.”
He nodded at me with a huge grin on his face. “It is a classic, but you have this all wrong.”
I was about to take another drink when I paused. “What do you mean? She punched me. That’s the signal.”
“Right, the signal that you’re just friends.”
“What? No, that’s not right. A punch is affectionate.”
“A punch is like saying, yeah, I like you, but it’s not going any further.”
“No, I swear. The punch is a sign she likes me. It’s the go-ahead signal.”
Brock snorted in amusement, but I didn’t find it very funny. “Yeah, it’s the signal that seven year old boys give to girls on the playground. You’re not seven and this isn’t the playground. She’s not into you like that.”
I frowned, thinking over the way she blushed when I told her that I couldn’t unsee what was under that curtain. There’s no way she was faking her reaction. “Okay, if she doesn’t like me, then tell me why her heart rate kicks up whenever I get close to her, or why she blushes from head to toe when I wink at her.”
“Uh…one, because you saw her naked when she was vulnerable. Of course she’s going to blush! And her heart rate kicks up because you’re boxing her in and making her uncomfortable.”
“Shoot,” I said in realization. “You think so?”
“It’s not rocket science. You misread the signals.”
I took another pull of my beer, wondering how I managed to do that. I really thought she was into me. Now…now things were just awkward. She was up in my shower, about to get in my clothes! How was I supposed to handle her prancing around my house wearing nothing but my t-shirt?
“You give her sweatpants,” Brock said, drinking his own beer.
“Sorry, what?”
“You were doing that thing where you think out loud.”
“I don’t do that,” I grumbled.
“Then how do I know that you’re wondering how you’re not gonna get a chubby while she’s here?”
I didn’t have an answer for that. But now I was totally screwed. I thought this was gonna go somewhere. Now...
“Well, hell. I really thought she liked me.”
“You could still go for it,” he shrugged. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
“She could punch me in the face instead of the shoulder,” I grumbled.
“Yeah, that could be bad.”
And then I thought of something even worse than that. “Man, we only have two beds.”
“Your point?”
“Where are we supposed to let them sleep?” I asked, getting up and kicking my damn chair. “It would be rude of us to make them sleep on the floor.”
“You think?” He said sarcastically. “I don’t know about you, but I’m taking the fatalistic one to bed.”
“Seriously? Even after all the doom and gloom talk?”
“I dig it,” he grinned. “Well, I’m mostly horny since Miranda won’t sleep with me. What’s with that?”
“Well, getting interrupted twice isn’t a coincidence. That’s a sign from the stars,” I said, just to piss him off as payback for him ruining my mood.
“Fu@k you very much. I guess this means neither of us gets the woman we want.”
“Yeah, well, I should have known. She said this guy was coming into town. What was I thinking?”
“That you’d rescued her and she’d fall to her knees and suck your co@k,” he pointed out.
“Right, I thought with the wrong head,” I nodded. “Screwed the whole thing up.”
“Face it, she put you firmly in the friend-zone. There’s no getting out of it now.”
“Fu@k.”
I hated the friend-zone. “And she’s actually nice, someone I might get along with in real life. You know, aside from my fake life as a construction worker.”
“Aside from that,” he agreed. “You know, it’s probably for the best. I mean, really, what’s a woman like that going to do with a guy like you?”
“You mean, aside from pleasure me all night long?” I asked sarcastically.
“Hey, I’m just saying, she’s not exactly the type to go out with a guy like you. You’re too…brutish.”
“Brutish? I don’t think I’ve ever been called that.”
“Well, compared to a normal guy,” he said. “You know, like a teacher or a banker.”
I rolled my eyes at the comparison. “Hey, I can be just as normal as a teacher or a banker. I have normal guy qualities.”
“Name one,” he said, staring over at me expectantly.
I sat there for a few minutes, trying to come up with something. “Okay, what about this…I like pool.”
He stared at me for a moment, then shook his head. “Ooh, you’re right. How did I miss that?”
“I think I have a real chance with Laura.”
“Yeah? Even after she flashed you multiple times, then ran upstairs like her hair was on fire?”
“Relax. I got the signal. It’s all good.”
“What’s the signal?” he questioned.
“She punched my shoulder.”
“Ah, the punch the shoulder routine. That’s a classic.”
“I know, which is why I know it’s all good.”
He nodded at me with a huge grin on his face. “It is a classic, but you have this all wrong.”
I was about to take another drink when I paused. “What do you mean? She punched me. That’s the signal.”
“Right, the signal that you’re just friends.”
“What? No, that’s not right. A punch is affectionate.”
“A punch is like saying, yeah, I like you, but it’s not going any further.”
“No, I swear. The punch is a sign she likes me. It’s the go-ahead signal.”
Brock snorted in amusement, but I didn’t find it very funny. “Yeah, it’s the signal that seven year old boys give to girls on the playground. You’re not seven and this isn’t the playground. She’s not into you like that.”
I frowned, thinking over the way she blushed when I told her that I couldn’t unsee what was under that curtain. There’s no way she was faking her reaction. “Okay, if she doesn’t like me, then tell me why her heart rate kicks up whenever I get close to her, or why she blushes from head to toe when I wink at her.”
“Uh…one, because you saw her naked when she was vulnerable. Of course she’s going to blush! And her heart rate kicks up because you’re boxing her in and making her uncomfortable.”
“Shoot,” I said in realization. “You think so?”
“It’s not rocket science. You misread the signals.”
I took another pull of my beer, wondering how I managed to do that. I really thought she was into me. Now…now things were just awkward. She was up in my shower, about to get in my clothes! How was I supposed to handle her prancing around my house wearing nothing but my t-shirt?
“You give her sweatpants,” Brock said, drinking his own beer.
“Sorry, what?”
“You were doing that thing where you think out loud.”
“I don’t do that,” I grumbled.
“Then how do I know that you’re wondering how you’re not gonna get a chubby while she’s here?”
I didn’t have an answer for that. But now I was totally screwed. I thought this was gonna go somewhere. Now...
“Well, hell. I really thought she liked me.”
“You could still go for it,” he shrugged. “What’s the worst that could happen?”
“She could punch me in the face instead of the shoulder,” I grumbled.
“Yeah, that could be bad.”
And then I thought of something even worse than that. “Man, we only have two beds.”
“Your point?”
“Where are we supposed to let them sleep?” I asked, getting up and kicking my damn chair. “It would be rude of us to make them sleep on the floor.”
“You think?” He said sarcastically. “I don’t know about you, but I’m taking the fatalistic one to bed.”
“Seriously? Even after all the doom and gloom talk?”
“I dig it,” he grinned. “Well, I’m mostly horny since Miranda won’t sleep with me. What’s with that?”
“Well, getting interrupted twice isn’t a coincidence. That’s a sign from the stars,” I said, just to piss him off as payback for him ruining my mood.
“Fu@k you very much. I guess this means neither of us gets the woman we want.”
“Yeah, well, I should have known. She said this guy was coming into town. What was I thinking?”
“That you’d rescued her and she’d fall to her knees and suck your co@k,” he pointed out.
“Right, I thought with the wrong head,” I nodded. “Screwed the whole thing up.”
“Face it, she put you firmly in the friend-zone. There’s no getting out of it now.”
“Fu@k.”
I hated the friend-zone. “And she’s actually nice, someone I might get along with in real life. You know, aside from my fake life as a construction worker.”
“Aside from that,” he agreed. “You know, it’s probably for the best. I mean, really, what’s a woman like that going to do with a guy like you?”
“You mean, aside from pleasure me all night long?” I asked sarcastically.
“Hey, I’m just saying, she’s not exactly the type to go out with a guy like you. You’re too…brutish.”
“Brutish? I don’t think I’ve ever been called that.”
“Well, compared to a normal guy,” he said. “You know, like a teacher or a banker.”
I rolled my eyes at the comparison. “Hey, I can be just as normal as a teacher or a banker. I have normal guy qualities.”
“Name one,” he said, staring over at me expectantly.
I sat there for a few minutes, trying to come up with something. “Okay, what about this…I like pool.”
He stared at me for a moment, then shook his head. “Ooh, you’re right. How did I miss that?”
About the Author:
I'm
a stay at home mom that loves to read. Some of my favorite titles are
Pride and Prejudice, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and Horatio
Hornblower.
I
started writing when I was trying to come up with suggestions on ways I
could help bring in some extra money. I came up with the idea that I
could donate plasma because you could earn an extra $500/month. My
husband responded with, "No. Find something else. Write a blog. Write a
book." I didn't think I had anything to share on blog that a thousand
other mothers hadn't already thought of. I decided to take his challenge
seriously and sat down to write my first book, Jack. I was surprised at
how much I enjoyed writing. From
there, the stories continued to flow and I haven't been able to stop. I
hope my readers enjoy my books as much as I enjoy writing them. Between
reading, writing, and taking care of three small kids, my days are
quite full.
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